Life is an ocean where high tide and low tide keep our life in a dynamic state. Emotions are those tides as well; their low tide in the external world means high tide in the inner world or a quest for calm waters. Here are my experiments in quest for calmer waters.
When life throws you in the deep seas, you can either sink or swim. Sometimes, there are no shores, just drifting logs, rafts, sharks, dolphins, whales in this ocean. How do we navigate out of this turmoil? I often asked myself this question, until I discovered meditation.
I think my quest for meditation began after seeing sculptures of Buddha in a meditative pose. I often wondered, where did he get that beautiful, evasive serenity on his face from? Was inner peace about shunning the riches and meditating under a tree? Was it about creating the Four Noble Truths and the Eightfold Path, or was it about living in the caves, far from the crowded noisy world?
Everyone thinks meditation is some deep practice ordained for yogis and sages. Well, thanks to the numerous new-age gurus and masterclasses, meditation is understood as visualisation or a process to help the mind find its anchor. There are over 100 methods of meditation listed in Bhairava Tantra, so the gods have revealed various ways of controlling the mischievous monkey mind.
Personally, I find meditation a therapeutic experience. You can read about my Vipassana experience here.
Over time, I realised that the inner quest also varies from individual to individual. There is no one path, just many paths leading to the same goal—self-discovery and peace. Ultimately, we only want what’s the best for us.
Much as I admire the Buddha, I don’t know if I follow his exact teachings, but I do believe that combining his teachings with my 21st century living, I do manage to keep myself centred on most days. These are the practices that I follow:
1.To cultivate self-awareness, I seek solitude, a space where the world melts. I wasn’t always like this; my first reaction was always phone-a-friend. It has taken me years of practice to enjoy my silence and my company because then a different world opens for me. Self-awareness leads to the ability to observe your thoughts, feelings, and reactions without judgment.
If you like meditation, then do that.
If journaling appeals to you, then go for it.
If you like nature walks, then do those, just don’t talk on the phone while walking. Be one with nature.
Be mindful, aware of the moment and your action. Pay attention to how you react to situations and the emotions that arise.
2. I embraced curiosity. Luckily, my profession gave me enough reasons to be curious and sceptic at the same time. I eventually learned the art of connecting the dots, processing the useful information and discarding the rest.
Travelling and journalism gave me enough to work on my personal growth. I asked myself some pertinent questions: What makes me happy? What are my fears? What truly matters to me?
Then, I gave myself enough time to process the answers, the answers that made sense to my inner self.
3. I challenged my existing beliefs. Sometimes the things we hold onto, are opinionated or judgmental about, are our limitations. We need to question our assumptions, reframe and recreate our worlds, out of the ordinary and into an extraordinary. If our beliefs, opinions and judgements no longer serve our higher good, we need to surrender them to the universe.
4. I embraced my shadow. The shadow concept was given by famous Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Gustav Jung. It focusses on the unconscious aspects of our personality that we often repress. Shadow meditation is a modern-day technique. But my method is simple: I close my eyes, go to my inner mirror and confront my shadow self. It tells me my hidden fears, desires, and negative emotions. Once I embrace this dark half, I find the circle of yin and yang, blending all my soul parts into one.
5. Finding my purpose. This is still a quest, though I often find the purpose lies in our range, we just ignore it as it doesn’t fit into our perceptions of dream life. Whatever is given to you, good, bad or ugly, is your purpose. You need to cherish and take care of it to the best of your ability. In that situation, find your art, your creativity, direction and motivation.
6. I embraced my journey. Inner quest, peace, motivations are not destinations. They are a process, an ongoing process. I take each step as it comes with its doubts and pitfalls and then clarity and vision. I embrace the experience and the learning.
Someday, if I let the process of evolution continue unhampered, I might have my awakening and be a Buddha. Buddhism gives us the seven factors for awakening, called sapta bodhyanga in Pali. These are:
Mindfulness (sati or smṛiti). To maintain awareness of reality, in particular the teachings (dhamma).
Investigation of the nature of reality (dhammavicaya, dharmapravicaya).
Energy (viriya, vīrya), determination, effort
Joy or rapture (pīti, prīti)
Relaxation or tranquility (passaddhi, prashrabdhi) of both body and mind.
Concentration (samādhi) a calm, one-pointed state of mind or ‘bringing the buried latencies or samskaras into full view’.
Equanimity (upekkhā, upekshā), to accept reality as-it-is (yathā-bhuta) without craving or aversion.
But before the awakening, there are five major hindrances of sensual pleasure, ill-will, sloth-torpor, restlessness-worry, doubt.
I also remind myself daily of The Noble Eightfold Path with eight interconnected practices:
Right View: Understanding the Four Noble Truths (reality of suffering, its cause (craving and attachment), the possibility of ending suffering (through achieving Nirvana), and the Noble Eightfold Path, which is the way to end suffering).
Right Intention: Cultivating wholesome intentions free from negativity.
Right Speech: Using words that are truthful, kind, and beneficial.
Right Action: Engaging in ethical conduct that avoids harming oneself or others.
Right Livelihood: Earning a living in a way that aligns with your values and doesn’t cause harm.
Right Effort: Developing and maintaining positive mental states.
Right Mindfulness: Being fully present in the moment, observing your thoughts and feelings without judgment.
Right Concentration: Developing focused attention through meditation.
My experiments continue. I don’t know how many decades it will take or maybe more births, but I carry on my inner quest because my goal is to remain at peace with myself.
I’m participating in #BlogchatterA2Z
Read previous posts: A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K,L, M, N, O, P
This post is part of Blogchatter’s CauseAChatter.
This blog post is part of the blog challenge ‘Blogaberry Dazzle’ hosted by Cindy D’Silva and Noor Anand Chawla in collaboration with Dr. Preeti Chauhan.
Queen of Treasures 
such a thoughtful self-exploration. In addition to the concepts, addition your own method of practicing it makes this content more meaningful. 👍
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Thanks, finding your anchor is so important.
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Journaling, nature walks and challenging my beliefs.. these are the things I’ve been able to actively embrace in the past few years. I hope, like you, I’m able to find my inner peace in doing these and some of the other suggestions you’ve provided here 🙂
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Happy Healing!
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What a delicious article. I too am at a centre – healing through yoga. It has been very helpful so far
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Wow, Ambika, I was in the middle of some thoughts, and reading this post answered them. Very well articulated. Thanks for sharing,
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Glad it was useful for you
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Like you, I’m deeply inspired by Buddha’s teachings and yet unsure if I’m practising it right. I try to combine what I’ve read of his teachings with contemporary understanding of mindfulness in an attempt to acheive peace, and more important, acceptance of what is happening in my life.
Your article renewed these thoughts and feelings, and so I’m grateful for it. So happy I got to read your blog.
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Very heartfelt and relatable post Ambica. I really like how uv brought out the essence of being with ourselves and finding out peace. The teachings of Buddha are really tough to follow but I guess each of us try to take what we can do practically from it. I am married to a Buddhist but the Buddhism my in-laws n their family follows is not even close to what The Buddha’s original teachings are. That is why Tibetan Buddhism makes me wanna run away.😬🤫
Btw, I find nature walks very therapeutic. If I am deeply upset or heartbroken or sad I like to be alone. When I was in my hometown I used to just set off and walk… there is no place to go that way in a city n I have to be at home.
I want to do meditation. Around 7/8 years ago, I used to wake up at 4:30a.m. and do pranayam n meditation but over the years I just gave up on it. Your post is a good reminder for me to start again.
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The awakening is in your heart and soul, and you should follow.that. I guess kids and family does take over, but do try and .make time for yourself again. I am sure you would enjoy finding yourself now after all these experiences.
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You are correct. We should do what works for us. I was not into meditation but when I started doing it, I saw it was really effective. Now I do it daily.
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Good to hear that. I find inner work very calming.
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Detailed post on Meditation and Buddha Quest. Being a Buddhist we still find it difficult to follow Buddhism. Since childhood we have been taught all these through meditation only. But still find way to live life and finding balance.
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I love how you have combined the traditional approach with your own experiences and found the path that works for you – I feel that is the best approach to inner peace, meditation and healing 🙂
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Embracing the shadow interests me. I wish I could look inside myself and confront my true self. But then, these are practices that need a teacher, I suppose to help one find what one is looking for.
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Loved your post, Ambica. We all have our own journeys. I am big on meditation as it also helped me manage my blood pressure, something that seemed difficult since I was allergic to the medication. Ditto on journaling.
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Glad to find someine who has experienced a tangible benefit of meditation. I find it the most peaceful time, to silence the mind and thereby the inner self.
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such a thoughtful post. We generally look for remedies of our problems but fail to acknowledge our own self. The pictures of Buddha englightens us with the Eight Fold Path that we must have read in our History books but fail to remember as adults.
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That was really deep Ambica. After years of struggle, I have finally found my purpose: to nurture both my daughters into becoming kind human beings. It’s easy to get lost in this maze of life and journaling and taking nature walks definitely help me in my dark phases.
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I find the transition into adulthood very confusing. It’s good to know that your daughters have a clear headed mom. All the 👌 best.
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It is indeed a thought provoking post from you quite different from the rest I read so far from you but what i would like to add is that we should try new things in life atleast once to see if it works for us or not, as who knows something better and brighter may be there for us.
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Oh yes. The more we keep learning, the better we become at finding ourselves 😊
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I’ve tried meditating and have failed at it, maybe I didn’t have the method or teaching. But like you said, there are other things one can do. I’ve realised that my best time is when I’m hard at physical workout. The pain is actually fun. People disagree, but hey, it’s my mind that totally welcomes it so why not?
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We are the masters of our life and we have to do what works for us. Happy workouts for you😊
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Finding purpose can be a lifelong quest. I appreciate your perspective on cherishing whatever comes our way, whether good, bad, or ugly.
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I m not into meditation or yoga. But in think people searching for inner peace through these methods will benefit from your post. You have also highlighted the teaching of Buddha pretty well throughout your post.
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I can totally resonate with the importance of meditation or anything that helps you get nearer to finding your inner peace. The world could be chaotic as you get older and do adulting life and its very easy to get caught with all of it and feel overwhelmed. It is through meditation and understanding that you can still have peace not only with your mind but soul as well that you get to appreciate life more.
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I loved the way you combined the traditional buddhist apprach as per your own version and narrated it. My fav quote is If you like nature walks, then do those, just don’t talk on the phone while walking. Be one with nature. We sometimes do the things for the sake of work, but mindfulness is utmost important to enjoy the journey .
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I hope you do attain your quest. We can all learn from your example.
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